If only she knew
by Meiko893
Summary: This is something like a Sasuke point of view thing lol it's my first fanfict so i hope you guys will leave some comments..


Those ever-so-famous words. _"If only she knew."_ I've been saying them ever since I lost her. Forever. But she doesn't know about me losing anything. She doesn't even know that I've felt this way since that very first day she smiled and flipped her long, pink hair. Man, it kept me up all night, thoughts running through my head.

I should've told her. But now she's lost forever. Only memories of her are left. I still remember her scent. Just like cherry blossoms.

_Sakura._

**********

It's the Chuunin Exams.

"Sakura, who did this to you?" I'm raging. I feel the power overtaking me. The power of dark chakra. I feel… _stronger. _

"Sasuke?" I can see the terror in her eyes. Her lovely cherry blossom pink hair, raggedly cut short. Her frame is shaking. She's bruised all over. A black eye is forming. I see tears. Sakura, like her name sake was never meant for all this. She's as fragile as the flower. Yet, she's here because of me. _Sakura, I can't return your feelings and you know it._

She's terrified of _me._ She had never been terrified of me, nor has she ever hated me. After all the cold, hard words.. she has never forsaken me. Through it all she offered me protection. A lot of love and affection, whether I'm right or wrong._ Sakura, why can't you just hate me? I don't deserve anything. I don't deserve to be treated this way. I don't deserve you!_

I hated that I couldn't make her hate me.

The dark chakra grew intense. I gave away an arrogant smile. _Hn._

Now, I hated the person who did this to her.

"Sasuke.."

"I'm fine. Just tell me who the hell hit you." She didn't speak. Obviously terrified.

"I did it." This guy who didn't know what he's about to face made a big mistake by opening his big gap. _I'm going to kill you! For what you did to the only person that cared about me!_

I killed. I am obsessed with this dark chakra. I'm losing control. _"_SASUKE! No! Please, stop!"I feel her arms wrapped around me. "Sasuke…" She's crying… for _me._ The dark chakra subsided.

_I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know. That I love her. I always did. But I just couldn't tell her and I don't know why. _

**********

It's one of those sunny days in Konoha. Kakashi-sensei is late as usual. Naruto got pissed and ran off for some ramen. That total loser. So it's just me and her. Alone. I take no notice of her.

"Hey Sasuke, let's talk!" Her voice, sweet like.. like.. er something sweet and soft like velvet sends this tingly sensation down my spine. _Damn._

"I have nothing in particular that needs to be told." The cold words escaped from my lips. The winds begin to blow and the leaves are dancing along. The birds are singing something that somewhat sounds like a love lullaby. _Hn._

She's upset, I just know.

"You never tell me anything…"

"It's none of your concern." Silence. But it didn't last.

"Sasuke, isn't there anything that could make you happy? Something that.. that_ I _cando?" There she goes again.

"I only live to avenge my family. There's nothing that can make me happy and thatincludes_ you._" I clench my fist into a ball. She's trying not to breakdown.

"Then I'm suppose to stand by here and see you tear yourself apart? I just can't bear watching …" Her voice broke.

"Then don't watch. Stay out of this." That did it. She's crying… for _me._

_I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know. That I love her. I always did. But I just couldn't tell her and I don't know why. _

**********

"I love you more than anything, Sasuke! So…so please…stay here with me." Tears are flowing. _"_If you can't stay_…take me with you_…"

I'm leaving Konoha. Leaving her. I have to. I need to become stronger in order to avenge my family. And _I can't bring her with me._ She's crying so hard it's killing me. She's crying… for _me._

"Sakura… Thank you."One blow to the neck and she crumbled into my arms. I carry her to a nearby bench and hesitantly pushing pink locks away from her face._ Yeah, I wish you could come along, but no._ My fingertips caressed her face.. My hands retreated. Man, I've never felt anything so… _smooth. _I look at her for a moment longer and turn to walk away. Leaving behind the most important person to me. Leaving behind the love that has always haunted me. Never to look back.

_I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know. That I love her. I always did. But I just couldn't tell her and I don't know why. _

**********

Years later. It's raining. I am about to kill Naruto. My best friend/rival. I feel the dark chakra. My katana begins it's strike towards my target. _"SASUKE! NO!"_

Too late. My katana hit it's target. Except the target was no Naruto. It was Sakura.

_No._

I feel Naruto's nine-tail chakra going away. I look at my blood-stained hands to my katana.

I pulled away my katana. Stained with Sakura's blood. _I killed her. No. NO. I didn't. It wasn't meant for her. She got in the way. She killed herself. Wasn't my fault. Hn._

She fall into my arms once more. This time barely alive.

She looks so perilously fragile. She slowly reaches out her warm hands to my still-cold face. _Hn, I've never felt such warmth in awhile_. I showed no emotions.

"Sasuke, have you avenged you family?"

"Yes. I have." _But I need you to revive my clan._

"I'm happy for you…" She smiled. The same smile that I fell in love with many, many years ago. I did not respond.

She's spitting blood. She's fading even more…

Her fingers make its way around the silhouette of my features. Even in this annoying rain, I can see tears making streams on her cheeks. At a time like this, she's still crying… for _me_.

Her emerald green eyes found it's way into my cold dark ones, probably for the very last time.

"Sasuke…I love you…" I still made no expressions. _But I'm screaming deep inside._

Still smiling, her hands fall to the dirt below. She faded. _Because I killed her._ I hug her closer and buried my face into her drenched but soft hair. How I wish it was longer. Even though soaked in rain, she still smells like cherry blossoms.

_I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know. That I love her. I always did. But I just couldn't tell her and I don't know why. _

**********

I am at her funeral. Everyone is there. And my sharingan tells me they all have the same disgusted thoughts about me. She's lying there in her coffin. Her coffin was white with cherry blossom petals painted on them._ She's not meant to be in there, you fool! _I just stand there staring at her. She looks peaceful. From a distance, I can hear Naruto tormenting poor Lady Tsunade with questions like why didn't they preserve Sakura in ice and most of all, why I was allowed to be here. I refuse to listen no more. They begin to read the entries of her diary. At every end of the page, the very last paragraph, she wrote:

_I wanted him to know. I told him that I love him. I always did._

_I wish Sasuke would tell me he loves me and that he always did. But he just couldn't tell me and I don't know why. _

That's when the bottle that held my feelings exploded and I ran out. I run and run 'til I could run no more. I stop under a cherry blossom tree. My soul is filled with regrets. _What have I done?!_

Instantly, my legs gave up and I fall to my knees. Tears are blurring my vision, slowly making it's way down my face. I'm crying… for _her._ I've never cried for anyone. I look above and all I see are pink cherry blossoms. I close my eyes. The winds caressed my face and I slowly take in the aroma of fresh cherry blossoms. Painful memories of her hit me. Real hard.

_Sakura…If only you knew._

_I should've told you all those years ago._

_It's was all a lie. A lie only a fool and, I have to admit, a loser like me can tell._

_You, Sakura, the only person who can fill the emptiness within me is gone and I'm back to being an empty shell._

_Sakura…I love you, always did, always will._

_I miss you so badly it hurts…_

I open my eyes. I look around searching for a sign of pink hair. Nothing.

I pick up a cherry blossom and kissed it.

_Forgive me, Sakura my love._


End file.
